Grace Shearrer's Non-Objective End-of-Year 2011 List of Inspiring/Comical/Entertaining/Motivational/Disgusting/Tasty Events, People, and Objects

2011 is like the ugly step child to 2010. The best of lists can't rely on a decade's worth of material, it technically isn't an election year, still no Animal Collective album (and the Radiohead sucked) and the economy blows. So, here is a list of what amused me in the first year of the second decade of the 21 century.

1. Bacon Wrapped Jalepeno Poppers
A tiny football of cream chee encased in a jalapeno and gently enveloped by the tastiest part of the pig... this is what i stopped being a vegetarian for, that and so people will stop assuming I am a hippie.

2. Yuck
BEST ALBUM OF THE YEAR BITCHES!

3. The Rapture and subsequent non-Rapture
First, I was really excited for the rapture. As a nonrapturee I was planning on more space to myself when the righteous were taken. However, due to lack of rapture, I am glad I was saved from a fiery pit. Everyone wins!

4. Hacky Sac
Preferred pastime of the gods.  Demands every ounce of coordination, agility, strength, cardiovascular endurance and concentration the human body can muster.  Also, you can do it drunk. Though not helping my nonhippie cred.....

5. AA+ Credit Rating
The US was down graded from a AAA+ credit rating to the AA+ credit rating. Personally, I am proud of the US for embracing its white trash roots and defaulting on creditors. I can only hope that we all get that Trans Am up on blocks in the yard now to celebrate.

6. Anonymous
They are like cyber batman!

7. US Ambassador to Tunisa

Tunisa: FUCK YA!!!

8. Repeal of DADT/ Troop withdrawal from Iraq
This is really just a win for me. First, I love military apparel, I am hoping this inspires more trench coats, brass buttons, and olive green. Second, I can now go to recruiting stations to get a shopping buddy... right?
Withdrawal from Iraq seems pretty straight (hee hee pun) forward: invasions of other countries= bad.
 
9. Season 4 of Breaking Bad
Sublist: Best Parts of season 4 Breaking Bad
              a) Half blown up Gus
              b) Walt poisoned Brock O_______o
              c) Tip of Mike's ear falls off
              d) "I WILL KILL YOUR INFANT DAUGHTER!!!!!"

10. GOP candidates
The republican party which I assume is against cable has made the best reality TV show this year. Eight batshit insane attention whores argue publicly, air dirty laundry, and are slowly voted off by the American public. Sadly, the winner gets to rule America... what else is on?

HM. Nyan Cat

                                                               I like pop tarts and kitties
        Honey Badger

 

"Look at that sleepy fuck"