on valentimes.

a brief history of sweethearts, the sugar-flavored chalk dust you love to eat and then remember why you hate them.


to start this post off by alarming you: THE NECCO CORPORATION HAS ALTERED THE TIME-HONORED TRADITION OF SWEETHEARTS AND HAVE NOW MADE THEM "SOFTER AND MORE FUN TO EAT". eating should be fun? i guess when you start off with a shitty piece of candy, the only way to go is up?


some other changes you should expect: 
1. new sayings. no more "fax me" or "be mine", we gotta get some "sext me", "walk of shame", "fb stalk", and so on.


2. new flavors! say goodbye to the old favorites: pepto bismol, toothpaste, and talc! helloooooo blue raspberry, green apple, and secret shame.


3. en espanol! yes, you may now make your crush uncomfortable in two languages! 


and now, some background on those delicious pieces of gypsum board:


a quote from the Necco website, on the eureka moment of the sweetheart:


"In the 1860's, when Daniel Chase, the brother of New England Confectionery Company's founder, Oliver Chase, began printing sayings on the candy. He experimented first with hand tools, and then devised a machine in which the cloth was replaced with a felt roller pad, moistened with vegetable coloring, usually red, which pressed against the die. The die printed the words on the lozenge paste and the double purpose machine cut the lozenges."


gotta love that lozenge paste. those chases were onto something.


so when you are ready to propose to that special someone and get rejected, think Sweethearts™.